So, I have gone back and forth about what to do with this blog. Continue it? End it? Start a whole new non-cancer blog? Let it sit? And, well, I finally decided.... to end it.
Although my fight is far from over, (a year more of Herceptin infusions every three weeks, five years of taking anti- hormone medicine, numerous more visits to my oncologist, scans, labs, eventually the removal of my ovaries, and whatever else I don't know about yet) I know (and hope and pray) that the hard part is over! And to be honest, this blog gave me something to do when I was too sick to leave the house or too awake to get some sleep. It helped me make sense of what I was going through and it kept me thinking and wondering about the world around me. Originally I started it as a way to inform my family and friends about what was going on. I thought it was for all of you out there! Then, somewhere along the way, I realized it was for me. Writing gave me peace. It helped me to look for inspiration when I could hardly lift my head. It allowed me to stay connected to the world and to all of the people I love without having to leave my house. It made me smile.
So, now, I can lift my head and I'm lifting it high! I can leave my house, and there isn't a day when I don't. I feel like I want to move on from this journey, archive it along with all of my travel journeys. As I look over on my shelf, right next to my computer, I see my eight hand-written journals filled to the brim with my travel writings. I always kept a journal while on the road. I was always writing. This blog is no different. I might not have been "on the road" but I was/am on a very long and spiritual journey.
Whenever I returned home from one of my ventures mentioned above, I always thought I would continue the writing. I always intended and wanted to continue my journals. I never did. Not one of those eight books has an entry once I hit American soil. That is why I knew I had to end this blog. I had to officially end it. I have to say goodbye because that means I'm forever saying goodbye to cancer as well! With that said, I hope to hell I never have to start this blog up again!
SO, a huge thank you to everyone out there that hung on with me. It means so much! I couldn't have asked for a better group of people to help me through these last 10 months!
Oh, and the "Cancer Sucks" team will re-unite next August for the Komen walk. :) Yes, I will have another party!
